Life and Times of a Nigga Called Da Muhs

I had a dream where I got shot in my head and died. The weird part was that I didn't wake up right away. Usually when I die in my dreams I wake up right away. This time it took a minute for me to wake up. So I was with a group of black people. I'm not sure who they were. I think it was family but I don't remember anyone in particular. Some cops confronted us (I don't know what we were doing). I yelled out that "we don't have any weapons and we are unarmed." A cop yelled repeating what I said to let everyone know that we didn't have any weapons and we were unarmed. (Although I do remember seeing some people with guns but the cops apparently didn't see them.) We were standing up but I don't know if we had our hands up or not. Suddenly one of the guys just started running (I'm pretty sure he didn't have a gun or anything). Nobody was doing anything illegal so there really wasn't any reason to run. A cop shoots him in the head and he go...

Last night some queer came to my door trying to get me to buy subscriptions to some magazines so he can earn points to win a trip to Italy. Maybe he wasn't gay but he was hyped up trying to convince me to help him out. He was like "Guess how much points I need", "Guess how much points I have", "Guess what place I'm in". I'm like "I don't know". He tells me he's in first place. Good for you. He handed me this brochure with a list of titles. I told him I'm not interested and hand it back to him. He tells me I'm messing with my points or something like that and hands it back to me. He started putting me down for some subscriptions because he asked if I like sports and I guess he put me down for a sports one then told me to pick another title. I kept telling him I'm not interested, but he kept insisting I sign up. He kept trying to guilt me by saying things like "You don't want me to go to Italy?". Well, ...

The check engine light in my car finally went off after being on for a while. I don't think I'm out of the woods yet because I don't feel like I quite addressed what's really going on with the car. Well, I thought I was good once I added coolant, but I did think it was strange that I had to add the whole bottle and it still didn't quite fill to the line it's supposed to. I suspected I may have a leak but I decided to just keep going and see what happens. Well, the car was behaving better for a little bit but the check engine light was still coming on. The car wouldn't overheat anymore and act up like it was doing before I added the coolant. But sure enough after a week or two the overheating light started coming on again. I went to the auto store and got some more coolant and added it. I'm not sure if the coolant was lower or if I just didn't add enough coolant before. Well, not too long afterwards the car started going crazy again. This time it deci...

My girls are a bit strange. They love to eat butter. Every time they see me take butter out when I'm cooking they both start saying "I want butter, I want butter". Sometimes I'll just hand one of them the stick and they'll just go at it. It was several months ago when they discovered butter. When I would make dinner I would sit them both on the counter so they can help out. I would let them eat some of the ingredients so one day I let them try butter. They both loved it. I don't know where they get that from. I don't remember ever liking butter like that where I eat it by itself. They're pretty picky about what they eat so I was surprised they liked it like that. Weird kids.

I've been at my job for a year now and I'm like the only black person in the office. There's actually a black field guy that I've never seen but I know he's black because I saw his Facebook when I looked someone else up and saw he was a friend of that person (No, I don't stalk people.........😐). Over the year I did see a black girl getting a tour of the office and later in the year there was a black guy I saw walking around the office for a few days. Maybe they're working upstairs or in another building, but I have not seen them again. We have two two-story buildings but it's not real big. Overall it is a good sized company which has offices in a few other western states (2 in CA, 1 in AZ, and 2 in ID). There's enough people in the Las Vegas office that there should be more black people around. If they are here I should see them at least once in a while, but I highly doubt they are here. Not to be racist, but we have so many Asians working here (and...

Around this time every year we hear about "The Rooney Rule" in the NFL. Basically it requires teams to interview at least one minority coaching candidate. I find this insulting to everyone, especially to black people. Similarly "Affirmative Action" basically requires colleges to accept a certain amount of minority applicants. These types of things are also hypocritical and counterproductive in my opinion. I think it's insulting because it tells us that we need special treatment in order to get to the "white man's" level. I would hate to be the Rooney Candidate if I'm interviewing for a coaching job. Regardless if I'm actually the best qualified candidate, I would feel insulted that I was only interviewed because of my skin color. It's also insulting to owners who conduct the interviews. It tells them that they can't find the best candidate on their own, as if without the rule they wouldn't know the possibilities they could find ...