It Must Be Hard Being Greasy

I parked at the grocery store in a handicap spot, put the tag up and walked toward the entrance. A guy was walking behind me and as I entered the store I hear him say "It must be hard being greasy." I wasn't sure if he was talking to me, so I kept walking. But then I heard him say it again. This time I felt like he definitely was talking to me, but I kept walking without looking back. As I was trying to figure out if he was really talking to me I heard him saying something else, but it sounded like he was on the phone with someone, continuing a conversation as if what he said before was part that conversation. I didn't catch what he was saying, but it was something like "...so my mom was trying to buy something or other from someone...." I don't know, I forgot what exactly he said, but it sounded like maybe he got on the phone and his earlier statement was leading him to tell someone about how someone tried to scam his mom or something. I didn't look back to confirm if he was actually on the phone with someone, but it was weird and confusing. I'm pretty sure he was talking to me because he wasn't talking prior to coming into the store. He probably assumed I, as a perfectly healthy-looking person, took a handicap spot illegally and that I'm some terrible person for taking advantage of my wife's tag. 

Well, first of all, how do you know I don't have some type of disability that's not obvious? You can't just assume things about people and try to call them out over it. How do you know I'm not deaf? I didn't turn around or acknowledge your ignorant comment, so maybe that's it. Yeah that's it. Maybe I'm deaf...I don't know why I would need a closer spot to the park places if I was deaf, but it doesn't matter. It could be any number of things. Maybe I should have fake limped to the store like Homer, or I coulda grabbed one of the motorized wheelchairs, but that would just make me even worse since I'm not actually handicapped. Ok fine, in this case I am being a little greasy using my wife's handicap tag to park closer to the building so my lazy, fat butt doesn't have to walk as far. But still, it's principal. Don't assume stuff about people. Plus, I was only going in there to use the ATM and get a loaf of bread and maybe a few other items, so I was going to be quick. Plus Plus, there was an open handicap spot closer than where I parked so at least I have some courtesy for others. And lastly, if you have something to say to me be a man and talk to me directly, not some sarcastic comment. Be direct. Don't talk sideways like a woman. And finally, what does that even mean? It must be hard being greasy? No, it's not hard being greasy. It's super easy. Leave me alone. Geez

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